So what does this mean? What does this mean for me? While I recognize that I have done some pretty bad things in life, I also like to think of myself as a generally good person. I can say that I have generally not tried to intentionally do harm. But David could say all of these things at one point also. It causes me great fear.
When the situation gets really troubling is when I think of blessings from God. I sat on a chair in the bottom of the library today and thought about how blessed I am. I have a wife and children that are far too good for me, I have financial blessings that the majority of the world don't have, I also have had incredible opportunities in education. I will presumably be starting law school in the fall, so I will have acquired a level of education that only a fraction of the world has reached. But it gets troubling when I think of what I have done to deserve these things. My answer is usually very little! I honestly can say that I don't think I deserve these blessings. And that is when I start to get scared.
What if David was simply a lesson? What if he was led along to show us what not to do. What if Bathsheeba was bathing that night that David was on the roof so God could raise a warning flag to the world about adultery. Although I think David chose the path he followed I still must ask if David was just a lesson. And if David was, can I be? What if all these blessings that I don't feel I deserve are just setting me up to be a lesson other people are going to try to avoid? Sure, I don't feel like I could do anything horrible now, but surely when David's heart was perfect, as the Old Testament says it was, he couldn't imagine doing the things he did. How do we know if we will do something wrong someday? We really can't say anything is below us after seeing David commit adultery with Bathsheeba and then send her husband off to die in war. Again, I would like to cast it off and say he was just evil, but he wasn't! Can we be? Another question that this raises is can we do something that is against our own nature? I think that is why they have crimes of passion. Sometimes people do things that they wouldn't do in normal situations (whatever a "normal" situation is!).
I don't have any answers for this one. I hope I can avoid the fate of David. Maybe adultery has become the focus because the story is about David, but I am talking about on a larger scale--just sin in general. Can we escape a similar fate? I have no idea what to do about David, Bathsheeba, Hell and Me!
2 comments:
A very good person, who is very close to me, sinned against God and against me. For many, many years. This very good person continued to serve God, and me, throughout all those years of deception, until caught in his sin. Sorrow, repentance, forgiveness, understanding, restitution, sickness, healing, wholeness, growth, and finally, gratitude.
Was that person evil? No. Not evil, but not grounded. Not spiritually real, regardless of his outer spiritual appearance.
David was caught in his sin and, unlike the majority of us, his sin was published, and not just in the daily news, but in a book that would endure for thousands of years. Was he evil? No. Not evil, but not grounded. Not spiritually real, regardless of his outer spiritual appearance.
I got to a point in my life where I wanted to be spiritually real, not just be a good member of the church. I love being here. It takes away fears, uncertainty, really makes me accountable to God and to myself. It makes me true.
So, all these experiences, ours and others', are lessons indeed, but only if we learn from them. Otherwise, they are simply devastating catastrophes.
Yeah, worrying about being a good church member isn't a big worry. Worrying about following God is. I do think there is lots of overlap, but they are two different things.
Still scary though. Because, according to some official people, David was damned in that he couldn't reach the highest degree of glory. Also, it is quite possible that his descent started from becoming "ungrounded" just like this significant person in your life. So someone who was perfect before God became damned because he became ungrounded. I know I have become ungrounded before also. So that is scary.
And for the nature thing, although we say we are naturally good, at least we come to earth that way, it seems we aren't really naturally good, it seems we are naturally neutral. Otherwise, a naturally good person was damned. That is scary.
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